Friday, June 29, 2007

And we take more..

Been seeing that Cisco board on the bunch of buildings across the street from our buildings. We leased 4 newer ones. Growth? Maybe;) Being 40 buildings-full and spanning over three towns length, just doesn't seem to be enough anymore;) Hummmmmmmmm...

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Boy! What a rush!!

Today and tomorrow are the last days before I take off on PTO (aka vacation) for a couple weeks, and I was choking at work. Not because I had some difficult tasks to do but because I had just so many simple/small tasks to finish. And I had to work in my lab which is kind of unusual, I am usually comfortably closeted in my cube and at peace. Today I had to walk up and down back and forth between meetings to the lab, to the cube, to someone else's cube etc etc etc. Talking to people, explaining stuff, going over what is happening, you know, the works! Ended up working even while walking in the corridor;) And I think for the first time before heading to a meeting at 4 pm, I was feeling hungry. I wondered why, when I realized, ahh, I forgot to have lunch in all this rush!! Phew! Hurriedly ate lunch (thank god I take my own lunch every single day;) ) in 10 mins and was 5 minutes late for the meeting;) Not too bad I'd say. And me is working even now, and tomorrow only promises to be worse, I just hope I get everything done before I leave. I hope....hope...hope...

I guess this was the first time its been like this before I took off on vacation. Just like I love to say "As you grow so you reap" ;) (Gee! Now that is too far fetched:P )

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Red and White

I was a black aficionado. Through and through. I loved wearing black anywhere and everywhere. My mom used to chide me and say its not the colour to wear to happy occasions, but I sneaked out in black as much as I could. Then I changed into wearing different colours. Minimized black altogether (though never losing that thing for black).

More recently I got into whites. In India, I would never wear whites because my mom never let me buy them. She would say its tough for her to launder those et al. Wild kids rolling in dust must not wear white etc;)

So anyway, till I got into whites I used to think Red and Black go very well together. Which is true even now, but after I matched up Red and White, pooh! Red and Black looks nothing like Red and White. Its quite a classy combination and I try to wear it at least once a couple weeks!

Sarcasm. Best form of Humour?

I notice more and more everyday that the amount of laughs sarcasm draws is not matched by anything else. In my reading ken, starting with Jane Austen all the way to Jay Leno, no one draws more audience than intelligent observers, who wittily provide sarcasm.

Sometimes, I think of turning to being sarcastic altogether, but really lack that talent. Some people possess enormous command over making sarcastic remarks which amuse everyone, but I can't. I just don't have that spontaneity.

I might look at something and think, "God, that is so wrong", but my perception stops at that. Or I might look at someone and think, "Whoa! That is so stupid", but that is it, I can't go further. I can't actually take that situation and make a witty point in it. Can't actually get my thoughts across the room with a sarcastic comment. And amuse everyone with it;)

Maybe I should cultivate this talent? Maybe...

But how do I do this without offending anyone? Hmm..

I know! I will pick some neutral grounds as to not infuriate anyone's sentiments. Maybe I can start with America-saves-the-world movies;)


I realized while scrubbing my posts (yeah I have to do that;) ) that I never wrote about the Rahman concert in Oakland at the top of the month (I like to say it like CNN yeah;) )

Needless to say it was crazy, frenzied and we all loved it very much. I will not describe the concert in full, you can read it here. But the highlights were

1) Oakland named June 2 (the day of the concert) as "AR Rahman Day". If you see Oakland, you will understand what an extra-ordinary thing this is. If it was Sunnyvale, maybe not, but Oakland yes. (I am actually surprised Sunnyvale doesn't have Indian street names already, but that is too forthcoming;) )

2) I was thoroughly disappointed in his concert for one thing. His claim-to-fame songs were not part of it at all, except Bombay's Humma Humma. I would have loved to see (hear, duh!) him starting with "Chinna Chinna Aasai" going to Donga Donga, & to Bombay & to Gentleman & to Rangeela's tunes to so many more. It was a huge disappointment for me! Sigh!

3) The display of torches (cell phone back lights, ingeniously converted) to his "Vande Mataram", by the audience, was impressive and the Arena folk had enough sense to turn off stadium lights so we could watch how well we were doing;) Thank God for common sense!

4) We met with Sivamani and took pictures with him and he actually said "Whaaat is this?" when I offered him my cheque-book to give me an autograph (Really now, I didn't have anything else handy, what was I to do?)

5) We saw Chitra and Sadhana Sargam while they were walking out. Chitra was feeling the Oakland chills @ 12 am ;)

6) We met Naresh Iyer and spoke with him briefly. He is really just a kid, I was so surprised to see him and just haven't been able to match his voice to his face ever since;)

Last but definitely not the least we saw the GOD! Rahman was out last and we were able to catch a brief glimpse up-close. What was sad was that everyone else was shuttled away in Mercs and Cadillacs and Hummer Limos (can you believe it? Desis are minting money here;) ) , the GOD was shuttled out in some stupid GMC truck (I have to start with my cars thingy even here??!?)

But anyway it was all worth it. Even listening to Hariharan badly damage some songs with his own personal touches to it, so typical of singers when they think they have done it all and get on stage. I personally never liked this man. Or enduring Sukhwinder Singh's badly timed show of excessive knowledge in Hindi lyrics and their background-slash-meanings. (Yuck! Yuck!)

When I was looking for the link above, I stumbled on the fact that Rahman is 41. He is 41?! Man!! He practically grew up in front of our eyes;)

Monday, June 25, 2007

If you want nutrition ...... on..

There is a store on State Street in Madison, WI. Its called "Chocolate Shoppe Ice Cream" Est. 1962, it boasts of "Genuine Super-Premium Wisconsin Goodness".

In the four years that I was in Wisconsin, I might have gone to that store a dozen times. Even though they give generous quantities of ice cream for a couple bucks (very typical in Wisconsin) and eating it used to make me feel terribly guilty for a week thence, I could never resist it. Ice cream was yumm!

Their ice cream was so heavenly that the only thing that beat it, was it's Nutritional Information. This is what it reads:

Disclosure : The following content is taken from one of their ice cream cups which I carefully washed and preserved after I devoured its contents and got a couple with me all the way from Wisconsin to California when I moved, and plan to take them with me wherever life takes me next. Full copyrights to "Chocolate Shoppe Ice Cream". It is true to every word on that cup, including the formatting in bold.

Nutritional Information:

Don't even ask. This is the best ice cream made in Wisconsin, and it tastes so good because it has gobs of rich Wisconsin cream, tons of real ingredients for boat-loads of luscious flavors. That means it's not low-fat, low-calorie or low-anything, and that's why everyone loves it.

You want nutrition, eat carrots.

Ha ha ha!!!

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Butchu, my alarm!

Yet another lazy Sunday my Roomba (which I nick-named Butchu) woke me up! Last Sunday, we slept late after a long night watching Sivaji, and in the morning I was woken by some strange noise while I was in deep sleep. I was afraid someone had broken in;) When I reached shallower surfaces of sleep, I figured it was Butchu beginning his daily duty;)

Very obedient;)

Saturday, June 23, 2007

The "Velagiri" and the decade it started..

We were talking to Subhash's cousin the other day, and she is in what I like to call the "prime" phase of life, academic or career wise;) She is in between EAMCET (That is the engineering entrance test in the state of Andhra Pradesh, India) and the beginning of Engineering. We were telling her, this is her time and place. This is what she should utilize to the best possible extent as she would never get such time to waste ever again;) Thoroughly discouraged her from going to those C classes she is taking (Hoping her mom doesn't read this;) )

That reminded me of my own phase between EAMCET and Engineering. And also that its been a decade since then already! Phew! Growing old I suppose;) So as a tribute to that period I decided to write this post as a commemoration at the end of a decade;)

Just a little background to begin with. We were always the lucky batch! When we were in X, the SSC papers were leaked. Not one or two but three. I remember, Biology, Social Studies Paper -1 and Paper -2. They kicked out the schedule for these three exams by a month, well into May. Thanks to which, I did miserably in my NTSE finals (after doing brilliantly in the prelims, please!) and to this day can't forgive the state board for it. INR 6000 was a fortune back then, sigh!

Then there was the Intermediate fiasco. If we thought SSC was bad, this came as a cruel reminder that we ain't seen the worst yet! This time around Math Paper-1 had leaked. And much to my agony, not only did they postpone the exams we hadn't yet given, they actually made us re-write the exams that we already gave!! Waaaaa! And it was French and English. French I didn't mind at all, I loved it. But English? What? You got to be kidding me! That day after I first wrote that exam, I went and hid my English text book in the farthest possible corner in the shelf, I loathed it so much. And when I heard this news, I had to dig back into that shelf to look for this textbook, actually hoping to find it. Couldn't believe my fate! Bah!!

And this time they went all out. Exams into June. We had to send out results to BITS by June 30, Naidu had to order the Math stream evaluation to be done ahead of the Biology stream, put up tents in Mahboob College in Abids and distribute memos like "palli wrappers". Gosh!! As if this was not enough, it was released the day of BITS' deadline, I remember that hurried auto trip we took from Abids to Secunderabad GPO (Of course the memos were given out after the GPO in Abids was closed, what do you expect!)

I guess that was the only year in which we wrote EAMCET before Intermediate and smashed all previous records of corruptions;)

Got into BITS I did, but didn't take it. Decided it wasn't worth leaving home for 4 years and missing all the food and fun. I knew those would be the last 4 years that i would be home properly being pampered. Rest is going to be one big slog all the way (I was kinda wrong, now I get pampered even more;) ). So anyway, decided not to go to BITS. Boy! I went off tangent here:)

So didn't go to BITS and convinced Vamshi to also not go;) We were five of us and had nothing to do till Engineering classes started. Heck! We didn't even know where we would be admitted. And counseling seemed to be slipping by the month. We were so restless after two years of slogging and working so hard, that we were almost hyperactive;)

And what did we do? Well, for starters I will just say we even watched a movie called "Mohabbat" which starred Madhuri Dixit and Anil Kapoor's brother (I don't remember his name, just remember that my Dad used to say he looked like someone who failed X standard;) ). And he wore really purple suits in this movie. This should be enough hint, really now! We watched every god-forsaken movie in town, got scolded by watchmen in movie theatres all over Hyderabad. We ate at every possible junk place in the city and in general made a lot of noise.

One really funny incident was when we went to Abhiruchi in Paradise and ordered 1 fried rice and shared it among 6 of us, because we sudden;y decided to have chat and we couldn't get out of Abhiruchi without looking foolish for having come in and gone out without eating anything. So we decided to look even more foolish by just ordering 1 dish. That notwithstanding, we ordered the waiters around to get extra spoons, forks, you name it! And after that we got all split up in groups while heading to Anand Chat (I hear its shut down now), so Teju and Shruti who went ahead, decided to look for us. Teju came back looking for us and Shruti decided to go ahead and order so that by the time we got there we could just eat so we didn't have to be late for "Raja Hindustani" (My god!!) So she goes:

Shruti: Che Bhelpuri (6 bhelpuris, and the bhels were mighty huge mind you;))
Waiter: (Giving her really weird looks) Leke jane ke liye? (To take with you?)
Shruti: (Nahi yaha hi khane ke liye.. (No, to east here, poor thing she was pretty serious)
Waiter faints;)

Another one was when Vamshi's landlady came running downstairs to provide assistance n the situation that everyone was wailing about, and was so enraged that it was a pack of useless girls laughing their heads off over "Dumb Charades" ;)

Its been a decade now but whenever we think of those days, we can't help laughing all over again! the lukhagiri was amazing, and never again to be had. Sigh!

Subhash's cousin has said that she will spend all her time with me so I am making an agenda to actively make her lukha too;)

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

The Bay goes to the... ...numbers;)

Everyday I come home on 237W, I think, I should write about it. Now that I am writing with a vengeance for all those days I didn't, I decided I have to finish this as well. Actually, the real reason is that I was stuck at the exit I had to take to get home, for a god 20 mins. So I couldn't but help remember it;) :P

When I moved to CA, I noticed all exits called by their names. None of them had any numbers in them. Extremely inefficient, I attributed it to my usual suspect, Californians' lack of respect for anything and everything. Including traffic engineering. Back in the midwest, we had exit numbers for all exits, so depending on which exit number MAPQUEST (remember there was such a tool?!;) ) asked you to take, you would exactly know how many miles away you were from it. But in the Bay Area, no. It was a mystery till you reached it (of course the map also TELLS you how many miles, but how much can you read off a paper when driving?! ). I noticed over the past 8 or so months, some exits slowly getting to have numbers in addition to the names. Notwithstanding my new Navigation system, I am thrilled;)



Loved this song the first time around itself (others are slowly growing on me;) ) from Sivaji. Didn't want to risk plagiarizing charges by pasting them here, so here is the song with the meanings;) Also checked out the comments to this post and they explain the song a little better, for ones that the author missed:)

Sahana..lyrics and meaning

Thanks Badri!!

Oru Koodai Sunlight...Oru Koodai Moonlight...

Back to movie gossip..

We watched Sivaji on Friday, in Tamil, first day late night show. 11.15 show got pushed out to 12 am as the movie ran a whole 3 hr and 10 mins. The theater was jam-packed (Aaahh Rajni!!) and as is always when we go to a crowded place, I saw a couple people from my University and Cisco. Desi-filled area it was. But that is not the point. The cops on that street near Park theater were thoroughly confused as to what this racket was all about. But that is also not the point.

Rajni was typical in this movie, too much style and persona. As usual the movie in itself was not very great, but worth watching for this 57-year old guy s(t)aying "Cool" throughout the movie. I used to hate him when I was a kid, I thought he was ugly-looking. But now I actually like watching his movies, he just cake-walks through all his roles. Anything and everything. That panache at 57 years, I certainly wish I have it when I am 57;) And what style! Thalaivar....

Songs were good, as is typical with Rahman's numbers, I didn't particularly take to them when I heard them first, but I am sure they are going into my prized iPod collection pretty soon, in Tamil, at that;)

BTW, when I was listening to his songs last evening, I fell across this gossip on his daughter's wedding with a 10-standard-fail guy. It read, "When it comes to love, even superstar is just father" in typical, broken English. (Where is this typical you ask? Read Music India Online's Tamil gossip for some "typical" samples;) ) It was a fun read, and even though basically broken, in much better English that your usual MIO articles about Tamil stars and their pursuits. (Ohh yes, I am sometimes vela enough to read those, and plead guilty to all charges)

Check this out:

Dhanush-Aishwarya Marriage ... Confusions

I researched some more about his daughters and saw his daughter's wedding reception pictures (Vela, vela vela!). I was actually searching Google for Aishwarya and was surprised, you would be too, that in the three images that showed up in the search, the first was Aishwarya Rai and the other two were actually Rajni's daughter's reception pictures!!!!!!! My my, how could I have been so ignorant!!

From here, I also found out that he has another younger daughter called Soundarya (One website claimed that if I didn't know that fact already, Rajni's fans would abolish me from Tamil Nadu, sigh! Ignoramus.). And I thought his daughters look very pretty. The second one especially was quite gorgeous, I had not expected that. But then, I never thought this much about Rajni and his life;)

Like Rajni says "Cool!"

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Hatchback, ouch!

I saw it yet again. Another Benz (E-class) mercilessly modified into a hatch back. I never understand why people want to take perfectly handsome looking cars and convert them into hag-be-it hatchbacks. I hate them. H-A-T-E hatchbacks. They look so ugly, I can't begin to describe it. I feel revulsive when I see those hatchbacks. Yuck! If you want extra storage space or a bigger trunk but something that is naturally made that way, why go and amputate a perfect looking car!!! Senseless senseless!!

Friday, June 15, 2007

Multicast.... my technology area. I work on it day in and day out. An incident back in school struck me suddenly the other day. I was interviewing with a company (I actually forgot which one it was, but just remember they were completely uninterested in hiring networking majors. And oh, that they had a grad reception the previous night at the "White Horse Inn" on Henry Street;) ) back in 2003, and for some reason I was really groggy. Maybe it was the time and place, but I was just in such a daze. One of the last questions the interviewer asked me was "What is Multicast?" And I knew it. I knew Unicast, Multicast and Broadcast. BUT at that moment, I was blocked! Completely and utterly!! I just couldn't think of or remember what it meant (kind of dumb actually) and I replied "I have no idea what it is" (Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!) and sure enough I didn't get that job;) (I never regretted it, it didn't look like it was made for me)

I came out of the interview, damn sure I wasn't getting this job and then 5 minutes down the corridor I went "Multicast is where you transmit the same stuff to multiple recipients without actually making as many copies" Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa? Why did I say "I have no idea what it is". I felt like running right back into the room and telling the interviewer this same thing. But alas! too late;) And in the evening I was lamenting to my friend about how I suffered "multicast amnesia" in that room. I have never quite experienced anything like that in my whole life, thus far. Complete mental block! Like the neuron that held my source of multicast information just went pop, and then there was darkness (and ignorance)..

Ironical, today it is my technology area and area of select expertise;) !!!

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

The SUVs vs. the Vespas

I noticed that my land-lady's parking spot had a brand new Dodge SUV in it this morning on my way to the gym. While getting to work, I asked her and she said that they had got one, yeah.

In the US, usually when families are expecting a baby, or have already had one in the recent past, they tend to buy an SUV. Family is growing, car needs to grow in size too ;)

On my way to the gym I was wondering ... as I do a lot these days;) Back in time, when we were a family of four, me, my sister and my parents, we still made do with the VESPA we had. having a car was a big-time luxury and I remember, all the four of us managed to move around with just the one VESPA, till we grew too tall for it. My mom and dad on the seat with my sister in between them and me in the front, holding on to the headlight and skillfully trying to not block it. And we used to wait and anticipate those rides around the city so much! Going to school by the VESPA instead of in the bus was the height of luxury:)

Now when I think of it, I feel good about how much petrol we saved;) The city has changed so much now. With rising incomes, 20-somethings afford cars, traffic has grown, and smoke bellows. The charm of the VESPA fades ...

India Shopping

Wonder who invented this term! Whenever I have to shop before going to India, I think about it.

We were telling my colleague about the "India Shopping" phenomenon. We told him it was like Christmas shopping, really not much different, except for you don't have a seasonal limitation to it, nor the tree-affairs. The context was that he was enlisting the advantages of taking in an Indian Bride in that he wouldn't have to do Christmas shopping (he implicitly meant Hindu bride I suppose). So we scared him proper with all the expectations that he would have to meet when he goes to India once-a-year (yeah, THAT is compulsory, can't be avoided;) ) not to mention, the cost to transport himself AND his bride there once a year;) At the end he was of the opinion that Christmas shopping was much better;)

I remember the first time I shopped for "India" back in 2002. I actually wrote a HUGE list of all relatives that I had to shop for. Then went around shopping for everyone trying to take something different for everyone. Whole affair took two weeks and packing another two. With things going in and out of the suitcases.

Now I just do generic stuff for everyone. Maybe 2-3 specific requests and the rest in 2-3 different genres. That first time enthusiasm has long waned in the myriad 6 trips that I have done so far;)

What 's in a plate!

I have been wanting to write this for a long long time but never got around to it. Personalized or Vanity plates for cars. I have my own analysis for the different kinds of plates and here goes:

Why people have plates that they do. Mine is simple enough, I put my name on all my cars, not because I want to but because Subhash prefers it that way;) (Yeah yeah, very convenient;) )

There is one category of plates which comes about when people pride themselves in what they do. Here I should mention a plate that I saw yesterday on my way back home because it is what actually triggered this post, I finally remembered to write it. The plate was "Ex Av8r" (Oops! I don't know if I am violating any privacy laws by mentioning plates in the open:P But if you put the plate on your car for the world to see, can you really sue me for putting it here? :D And as a goodwill gesture I might just let you know what my own plate says;) How is that for an offer you cannot refuse? ;)). So anyway plates which show off your pride in your profession ex or current (Maybe I should have NETWORK as my plate;) )

Then there is the category of people trying to express their deep and innermost emotions on a car plate! A "heart" B and so on and so forth, you get the idea.

Then there is the category of dedicating a car to someone. "4 G BUSH" (Yeah, right;)) etc.

Of course there is the category of putting your name on the plate (as a way of saying this car is mine, remember the handkerchiefs pinned along with your ID on your kindergarten uniform?;) ) I belong to this category, yet again, not because I want it that way;) (Yeah, whatever!)

One category is confused. I can't read the plate nor can I make out what it means. One example could be "XLGNDS" (No, this is not an actual plate, just something I made up by way of example) Plates that make you go "What in the world does that mean??"

Personally the category I think most stupid is when people state the very obvious, like putting "AUDI" on an AUDI, "MERC" on a BENZ, "BMW" on a BMW et al. Please, it shows a complete lack of imagination!!!! Its name shows on the head of the trunk, why do I need to read it on your plate in bigger letters yet again?!?!

The other category is innovative. Plates that say fun things in the best imaginable way :) "I AM MAD" could be stated as an example (no, this is not a real plate either, d'uh!) Or plates that are teasers. Its a challenge to spell them out again and again and when you try to say them in all possible ways, you hit the right sentence that the plate is trying to shout loud;) And then you feel a sense of achievement, just like that, while driving!!

Change, change change!!

I am a person that is averse to change! Actually used to be averse to change. Completely!!!! To cite an example, my mom used to frequently change the setting in the house. Sofa sets from here to there, the side table moving around etc. I used to hate those times. I would ferociously oppose any such change in setting but in the end, as is with moms, they always win. But the next time she would try to change it again, I would oppose this equally ferociously. Even though I once never wanted it that way.

Eventually I grew to realize that the sofa location was not important. It was that change from the familiar setting, that averseness of the new, that reluctance to let go of the past.

Today I try to be more adaptive to change. Try to embrace it. And firmly believe in the saying"The only thing permanent in life is change!". But it is still a long-ways to come.

Friday, June 08, 2007

Wholesome (maybe not so much ;) ) fun!!

I have been postponing writing this blog for a long time. It is about a release party we had half-a-year ago and how it all ended.

At the release party, the admin's idea was to play water balloon. So she got a bunch, and also a pump to match. The party was on an open space in the campus and was meant to be strictly (ahem!) outdoorsy.

Thus happened that everyone ate so much (what do you expect when you have samosas and spinach puffs!?) and fell to just talking, no one was motivated enough to play anything. Some went off to play Volleyball, some to play Frisbee. I played Frisbee, but the thought of those water balloons going waste was killing me. Sigh!

So even though the pump idea didn't work, I actually walked into the cafeteria ahead and filled some balloons with water from the faucet in the coffee shop's kitchen. (Needless to say, I made a mess, and since it was their closing time, I also cleaned it up). Then I came out and picked a colleague who was least likely to thrash me and hit him hard with the balloon. And the game caught on with soon everyone filling tens of balloons and eventually whatever they found, tubs, bottles, mugs etc. Not going into gory details like senior managers hitting their managers, (essentially the director of engineering;) ) I will only say that the outdoor fun ended with one of the senior managers being chased around the fountain and drenched head to toe with a whole tub of (dirty) water, from the fountain;)

Now in all this melee, my own manager escaped. He is a quick runner and we just couldn't catch him. We followed him around all the bushes but he kept getting away, after a while we saw him comfortably perched on the third floor of the building to the right of this pandemonium. We gave up on him, hopeless!

We walked back to our building through the cafeteria with another manager ahead of us. But what is this? He was dry? No, no no no no, not to be borne! So we talked and walked with him till we crossed the cafeteria and came out on the link to our building. Then hit him with one of the balloons we were saving up to go back and target my quick boss. Sorry! Can't see you like this;)

Then we went up, saw our boss locked cozy in his office, tried a lot to get him out, but no, he wouldn't. We proooooooooooomised that we didn't have any water, we had an important issue to talk about BLA. BLA. BLA. No use!

Then he said something. What did we hear? "I already had water poured on me!! Cold water!! Please, no more water!!" And how is that possible??

Turns out that one of my colleagues who had a meeting with him, went in for the meeting, and the dialogue ensued thus: (Disclaimer: I have stayed as true as possible to this narration)

Manager: Hi
Colleague: Hi
Manager: So how is everything?
Colleague: Do you want to save anything on your desk?
Manager: (Now perplexed) No?!?! Why?
Colleague:(Opens a cold bottle of water he got fresh from the refrigerator and pours it on top of manager's head)
Manager:Oh my God!!!!

All of us: Ha ha ha ha ha (after listening to this narration from him;) )

Actually now it reminds me, this happened almost a year back, not even half a year, maybe 10 months! Boy! That was hilarious. We were narrating this to another colleague who was in Germany at the time (watching Italy beat everyone in soccer) and he was so upset that he missed it. What soccer game can provide such entertainment?

None indeed!

Bachelor, Officer and a Gentleman (Ha????)

This series from ABC is the most shameless piece of American Television I have watched. It makes Elimi"date" look holy.

Basically, its about this shameless officer (from the Navy) ! I didn't even like him. And then there is the yet more shameless women. The deal is that this moron is going to shortlist and pick one of the [25, I think] "ohh-my-gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad" candidates and make her his wife. (Huh? did you say?)

Thank God I don't watch TV. Else I would have watched this piece of crap at the beginning when there would have been all those women falling all over this guy. I watched the final episode which was thankfully just two women. And even with that, at the end, I was nauseated and felt sick. Yuck! Both of them are all over him and he takes both of them home (separately of course), takes both of them on "serious" dates (yeah, thank god this is done separately too), both the gals tell him they want to live the rest of their lives with him and he goes and discusses with his family which one he should marry bla bla bla bla bla. All that crap. And each of the girls is hoping she has told him in enough and convincing-enough ways that she loves him. And separately tells the camera that she is hoping he would pick her. Man! What happens when you don't get picked? Do you star in the next season?

It is like what John Tucker does in "John Tucker Must Die" only all his girlfriends (all 25 of them, mind you) are aware that he is seeing another 24 and going on "romantic dates" with all of them. And its like brazenly practicing polygamy on National TV. Sans the vows. Even the family is so shameless as to let him date all these women together and pick one. And then forget not, he is a gentleman (my foot!)

This is what the description on their website reads:

U.S. Navy Lieutenant Andy Baldwin, M.D., 30, an undersea medical officer for a special operations dive unit stationed in Pearl Harbor, Hawaii, has been selected to star in the tenth edition of ABC's popular romance reality series, when The Bachelor returns to the network in the Spring of 2007. In addition to his professional accomplishments, this Bachelor is also a world-class triathlete. Now this real-life 'officer and a gentleman' faces the most exciting mission of his life -- finding true love.

Andy's achievements are matched by his good-natured personality, stunning good looks and self-deprecating sense of humor. He's an unabashed romantic, has watched the series and believes that the show can help find him the woman who could become his wife. Who doesn't love the movie 'An Officer and a Gentleman'? We're bringing the best parts of that romantic film to real life, said Mike Fleiss, executive producer of The Bachelor.

Hosted by Chris Harrison, The Bachelor is produced by Next Entertainment in association with Warner Horizon Television. Mike Fleiss and Lisa Levenson are the executive producers. David Bohnert and Martin Hilton are the co-executive producers.

Watch more shamelessness here:

Guys, get a grip. What else must we see in the name of "reality television" Oh God!!

Can you get this shameless, ABC? And it calls itself the "ABC Family" channel!


MAD is great!

I recently started reading the MAD Magazine. Subhash picked up one on his way home one day and I took it to the gym yet another day and I am hooked. I give it to you guys, excellent parody. Unparalleled sarcasm.

I was reading an AD in that magazine today. From their latest edition, with the Spiderman cover. Wondering why US Army would advertise on MAD of all the places;)

When I actually read the AD, my doubt was doubled. It read

"Patriotism is a great inspiration..
Unemployment is a great inspiration"

(Definitely these, I have to cross check for sentence accuracy)

I was like, wow! Its come to this. Shamelessly admitting that is for nothing, you should join the US Army if you are jobless. And the ad showed a greedy-looking lieutenant helping a surly looking slightly-obese guy sign some papers and smiling away like he won a conquest. Another referral ;)

And it read:

Lieutenant (or was it Captain? Heck! Who cares!) such and such helping unemployed Raoul such and such sign on.

I went "I don't know what to say". Then I read some more pages and came to another AD. This one read

"Feel the surge of excitement" and showed troops marching. And also read

"Excitement is taking part in aimless wars with other soldiers" or some such thing.

Now I was convinced, this can't be as brazen as it looks. Then I scanned the whole page carefully and found this:

Parody AD by MAD

Ha ha ha. I am definitely watching for that space;)